Mind! I don't mean to say that I know, of my own knowledge, what there is

particularly dead about a door-nail. I might have been inclined, myself,

to regard a coffin-nail as the deadest piece of ironmongery in the trade.

But the wisdom of our ancestors is in the simile; and my unhallowed hands

shall not disturb it, or the Country's done for. You will therefore permit

me to repeat, emphatically, that Marley was as dead as a door-nail.

-- Charles Dickens, "A Christmas Carol"

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what

you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.

-- Mark Twain

Q: What's tiny and yellow and very, very, dangerous?

A: A canary with the super-user password.

Fame is a vapor; popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is

oblivion.

-- Mark Twain

Expect a letter from a friend who will ask a favor of you.

You will be singled out for promotion in your work.

Q: Why is Poland just like the United States?

A: In the United States you can't buy anything for zlotys and in

Poland you can't either, while in the U.S. you can get whatever

you want for dollars, just as you can in Poland.

-- being told in Poland, 1987

The bay-trees in our country are all wither'd

And meteors fright the fixed stars of heaven;

The pale-faced moon looks bloody on the earth

And lean-look'd prophets whisper fearful change.

These signs forerun the death or fall of kings.

-- Wm. Shakespeare, "Richard II"

I will honour Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. I

will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future. The Spirits of all

Three shall strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons that they

teach. Oh, tell me that I may sponge away the writing on this stone!

-- Charles Dickens

You will meet an important person who will help you advance professionally.

You will have a long and unpleasant discussion with your supervisor.

Your mode of life will be changed for the better because of new developments.

My only love sprung from my only hate!

Too early seen unknown, and known too late!

-- William Shakespeare, "Romeo and Juliet"

Writing is turning one's worst moments into money.

-- J.P. Donleavy

You will win success in whatever calling you adopt.

That secret you've been guarding, isn't.

FORTUNE PROVIDES QUESTIONS FOR THE GREAT ANSWERS: #21

A: Dr. Livingston I. Presume.

Q: What's Dr. Presume's full name?

Consider well the proportions of things. It is better to be a young June-bug

than an old bird of paradise.

-- Mark Twain, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar"

You will wish you hadn't.

Kiss me, Kate, we will be married o' Sunday.

-- William Shakespeare, "The Taming of the Shrew"