Good day for overcoming obstacles. Try a steeplechase.

Q: Who cuts the grass on Walton's Mountain?

A: Lawn Boy.

The difference between a Miracle and a Fact is exactly the difference

between a mermaid and a seal.

-- Mark Twain

Seeing that death, a necessary end,

Will come when it will come.

-- William Shakespeare, "Julius Caesar"

A Tale of Two Cities LITE(tm)

-- by Charles Dickens

A lawyer who looks like a French Nobleman is executed in his place.

The Metamorphosis LITE(tm)

-- by Franz Kafka

A man turns into a bug and his family gets annoyed.

Lord of the Rings LITE(tm)

-- by J. R. R. Tolkien

Some guys take a long vacation to throw a ring into a volcano.

Hamlet LITE(tm)

-- by Wm. Shakespeare

A college student on vacation with family problems, a screwy

girl-friend and a mother who won't act her age.

Keep emotionally active. Cater to your favorite neurosis.

You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.

Every why hath a wherefore.

-- William Shakespeare, "A Comedy of Errors"

Q: How do you keep a moron in suspense?

Your own qualities will help prevent your advancement in the world.

A light wife doth make a heavy husband.

-- Wm. Shakespeare, "The Merchant of Venice"

Try to value useful qualities in one who loves you.

The camel died quite suddenly on the second day, and Selena fretted

sullenly and, buffing her already impeccable nails -- not for the first

time since the journey begain -- pondered snidely if this would dissolve

into a vignette of minor inconveniences like all the other holidays spent

with Basil.

-- Winning sentence, 1983 Bulwer-Lytton bad fiction contest.

Q: What's buried in Grant's tomb?

A: A corpse.

Q: Why do mountain climbers rope themselves together?

A: To prevent the sensible ones from going home.

You will be audited by the Internal Revenue Service.

Q: What do Winnie the Pooh and John the Baptist have in common?

A: The same middle name.

Q: What do little WASPs want to be when they grow up?

A: The very best person they can possibly be.

Your love life will be happy and harmonious.

FORTUNE PROVIDES QUESTIONS FOR THE GREAT ANSWERS: #4

A: Go west, young man, go west!

Q: What do wabbits do when they get tiwed of wunning awound?