My Halloween costume this year is Sam Altman I’m gonna dress like a dork and go around asking people for money
ah shit. accidentally posted my credit card info instead of a slur. please no one look at my last 20 tweets
I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that if slavery was still legal Amazon and Tesla wouldn’t be mad about it
thou shalt not worship false idols (RETWEET IF U AGREE) just bought a 20 foot gold trump statue for the church lawn. its different actually. completely different situation
desperately trying to explain to the youth group that “THOU SHALT HAVE NO GODS BEFORE ME” has an asterisk for “unless they hosted the apprentice”. its in the original Hebrew
jeff bezos personally called me, begging me to stop you all from unsubscribing. i told him “shut up nerd” & crushed 600 of his little prime boy packages with my immense ass
My party trick is making anxiety look like a personality wbu
“freedom is when i get to choose which government watches me through my microwave” - edward snowden’s guide to principled resistance
protip: if you see someone having a good time online you are legally and morally obligated to tell them why they’re wrong about everything
frantically googling “how to uncancel yourself” as the mob outside my house chants increasingly specific details about my search history
If you ever do this you deserve to burn in hell for all eternity I don’t make the rules (I do)
Look I mean this in the nicest way possible but Jeff Bezos is has and will always be a cunt
if your network is your net worth then im worth approximately one (1) expired cup noodle. the shrimp kind. not even the good flavor
FREEMAN
congrats to jeff bezos for inventing a bold new form of media ownership where you buy a newspaper and then put a big piece of tape over its mouth. very innovative. same day shitting.
Flaherty is a weapon.
how dare you be mean to the nice man who simply wants to be president again and also deport several million people
World Series time. Let’s do it Dodgers.
“Cultural Marxism” is made up right wing bullshit. That doesn’t mean it’s harmless.
Gift link:
medium.com/westenber…
