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The Babylon Bee
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Fake news you can trust.

Dead Worm Found In RFK Jr.’s Brain Already Polling Higher Than Biden In 11 States https://t.co/v1STabjycx https://t.co/pABxmnMsgr

Israel Warns Civilians To Evacuate Rafah In Most Incompetent Genocide Ever https://t.co/qCT0btxuk4 https://t.co/G0HyZmReLm

Clarence The Angel Takes Gavin Newsom To Florida To Show Him What California Would Look Like If He'd Never Been Born https://t.co/8rZmdcYSLl https://t.co/B68pnjOhaO

‘I'm A Depraved Wretch,’ Says Calvinist Smugly https://t.co/kN69DsIQS7 https://t.co/o2xpBol6mI

14 Keys To Acquiring A Ridiculously SHREDDED Physique https://t.co/Sfy2tYArlC https://t.co/ZJq9Gdrso6

Biden Reassures Americans That Someone In His Administration Is Probably Doing Something About The Border https://t.co/PIyzZ45bxf https://t.co/wPeEnyrEln

Ben And Jerry's Introduces Fun New Flavor 'Push The Jews Into The Sea Salt And Caramel' https://t.co/71zCKr2cPu https://t.co/jXSVnRLiyT

'Me Teach You White Man Secret Of Fire!' Governor Hochul Says To Primitive Black Children Of The Bronx https://t.co/6VW69jzKNH https://t.co/THxA9eHpo1

Target Unveils New Line Of Hamas Intifada Wear For Children https://t.co/MiN9LxVyDX https://t.co/pP0aakKSWT

For Greater Inclusivity, Boy Scouts Of America Removes Every Word In Name Except 'Of' https://t.co/pnssqAxWtm https://t.co/w5q8k3dNxu

Priest Reveals 12 Weirdest Sins People Have Confessed https://t.co/d2ESKWi126 https://t.co/qT5nGrmZqs

Uighur Slaves Struggling To Keep Up With Demand For Palestinian Headscarves https://t.co/xM7swbtL0i https://t.co/vw09tHKvQV

Zelensky Says He Survived An Assassination Attempt And He'll Tell Us The Thrilling Details For Only 45 Billion Dollars https://t.co/52LNsmPWrv https://t.co/reBwZXW4Zb

12 Women Come Forward Alleging They Were Sexually Assaulted By Whoever Trump’s VP Pick Is https://t.co/AhKIIOGXGQ https://t.co/NnxXThdmF4

Man Can't Remember What He Came To This Browser Tab For https://t.co/2APXOwNJtn https://t.co/5Mo7cjaokm

Worried About Abortion Being Banned? Avoid Getting Pregnant With This One Foolproof Trick! https://t.co/bTogxexh6C https://t.co/qCZEAs8rQj

Kid At Baseball Game Unsure Whether Fans Are Cheering For Aiden, Braiden, Cayden, Or Jayden https://t.co/htu5b52UAr https://t.co/rCSRiJ0VIn

Wife Spends Afternoon Online Trying To Decide What Husband Will Get Her For Mother’s Day https://t.co/BLoDQfxG3m https://t.co/SOWNVR6Vra