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The Babylon Bee
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Fake news you can trust.

Wife's Loud Gasp While Reading Phone Means Someone Either Died Or Got A New Handbag https://t.co/mPGqjtrLBS https://t.co/EKa9QNsaM8

Kamala Harris Seen Cackling Uncontrollably, Likely Meaning WWIII Has Begun https://t.co/fYGEG0oV0V https://t.co/Oqgp9pU8pJ

Gideons Now Smuggling Thomas Sowell Books Into Public Schools https://t.co/8AWQQjcZAY https://t.co/QehS0W7C65

‘JD Vance Is Weird,’ Says Guy Who Signed Bill To Put Tampons In Boys' School Bathrooms https://t.co/ngbO6sBPEr https://t.co/6wtXQILEzx

Tim Walz Reveals First 10 Things He Would Do In Office https://t.co/VLLqxZx3WU https://t.co/oYUUDho9Dz

Zephaniah Tired Of His Parents Asking Why He’s Not A Major Prophet Yet https://t.co/aimLltrfQi https://t.co/DiuIDi6rt2

A.I. Transformed Into Illiterate Moron After Just Three Hours Watching CNN https://t.co/WncsuVctF4 https://t.co/AJwU9aA3Bn

Feminists Warn Young Girls Against Marrying Rich, Muscular Football Stars Who Love Them And Take Care Of All Their Needs And Praise Them In Speeches https://t.co/Zi3KmLrERC https://t.co/xFk9UPJJ5b

Genius: Man Survives Market Crash By Not Having Any Money In The First Place https://t.co/3hOwDngFQC https://t.co/hhLHYSkXmb

Democrats Worried Choosing Jewish Vice President May Cost Them The All-Important "Death To America" Vote https://t.co/Ee3ogpYyPW https://t.co/3lnF6HQ2Yq

Kamala Desperately Googles 'What Is A Stock Market Crash' https://t.co/dYoiRhJCjk https://t.co/wDfXCy9qbn

British Man Forced To Use Finger Guns To Fight Off Knife Attack https://t.co/wZXTb4bRyg https://t.co/tWcEwDekSR

Referee Warns Olympic Women’s Boxing Finalists Not To Punch Each Other In The Testicles https://t.co/PoUw947hCa https://t.co/8Bywu15I3G

Facebook Renamed More Accurate 'Keeping-Track-Of-People's-Birthdays-Book' https://t.co/jT4NkTq1ln https://t.co/auq1hp0aVg