I was coming up on 14 years in EMS. I had burned out several times over, nearly at 5 year intervals. The last couple of years I'd been on a 24 hour unit in order to earn enough overtime to help build our emergency fund and get our debt down to the house mortgage only. I had a great partner, which helped reduce the stressful side of the job. Still, each shift meant 16 calls on average. No station and any rest came in occasional 15 minute intervals. I felt like I was aging at twice a normal rate.

Right around this same time (2018) I had a profound (for me) realization. I was in charge of my own life. Up to that point, my greatest fear was being stuck or being unable to make changes in my life. I realized that was false. Seeing improvements as I trained translated over to the realization I could change whatever I wanted. #grownostr #growyourself

Once I had a clear and sober mind I was able to start addressing various shortcomings that I'd locked away most of my life. High up on that list was a fear of change, fear of self improvement and the need to take on full acceptance of personal responsibility. I'd spent many years in a mindset centered around identity politics and emotion based decision making.

I quickly found out that frequent alcohol use and training were a bad mix. In August 2018, my wife and I decided to remove it from our lifestyle. It turns out that it also removed quite a few people from our friend group as well. Most socializing (especially for me) was centered around the local craft brew scene. Without that in common, many associations fell away. #grownostr #growyourself

I knew I would need some kind of programming to follow in order to stay on track. I joined an old school style weight training gym in our neighborhood, a five minute bike ride away. The membership included 4 weeks of personal training with a guy who turned out to be fairly useless except as an example of how not to teach and consult with people. Once I was through with him, I began the Starting Strength method.

This is why I don't worry about starting my tomatoes anymore. I know robust volunteers are going to come up when the time is right.

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Observations from suburbia: retired gentleman meandering through his postage stamp manicured, all ornamental planted yard. Sprays a little Round Up. Meanders more. Runs the mower a bit. Stops. Stares. He seems lost. Like he's trying to take pride in his little spot in the world but can't quite get it to click. I feel for him. I see this so often. #grownostr

I've got a day of property maintenance jobs ahead of me, scaled back significantly from a coupme of years ago. I decided to move all earnings from maintenance to the wintertime (slow season) fund as I continue to build up the education/ consulting side of Strong Roots Resources. #grownostr #smallbusiness #sidehustle

Here's the thing about training. Once I've made it to class I've never regretted it. On the rare occasion I've skipped class, I've internally berated myself the rest of the evening. Always put in the time. Show up.

Been rather fatigued the last couple of days. Digging in now to knock out 2 hours of jiu-jitsu. Let's see how I feel afterwards.

All the cool kids told me to get my ass over here. Who am I? East Tennessean doing the off grid homesteading thing at the edges of suburbia. SRR designs edible landscapes, and teaches others how to understand the land. Been side hustling all of my income since 2020. I love freedom, personal responsibility and don't give the first fart about whatever silliness is going on in mass media or politics.