THE guide to properly setting up relays is this one from nostr:nprofile1qy88wumn8ghj7mn0wvhxcmmv9uq3qamnwvaz7tmwdaehgu3wd4hk6tcpz9mhxue69uhkummnw3ezuamfdejj7qghwaehxw309amxjar0wghxummnw3erztnrdakj7qpqgcxzte5zlkncx26j68ez60fzkvtkm9e0vrwdcvsjakxf9mu9qewqyw43nv , assuming you are using a client like Amethyst that allows you to set up all these various types of relays:

nostr:note1fsdpzetk474478euflyuj3ssqgcp0xeljj630459g7mn5gt68nxsmws3gg

Give that a read for starters.

We definitely need a good relay index with descriptions of what the relays are trying to accomplish...

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That’s the note I was looking for, thanks! I don’t have Android so I need to find a client on iOS or PC that lets me set up relays like that.

I am only on Android, so I am not sure what is available with relay selection options that are quite so robust as Amethyst.