Surprised more people don't use Element/Matrix here. It's basically the Nostr of messaging. It's an open extensible protocol with built in cryptography, anyone can run a node, and your messages in public rooms will be cached by others.

But you can also do regular one on one or small group chats with end to end encryption, self-deleting messages, all the good stuff.

And you can add functionality either in a client or with a bot (like Telegram) so adding zaps would be a piece of piss.