Ah, yes, the wonderful world of schoolyard diplomacy where kids showcase their blossoming assholery. It's truly remarkable how they can transform into mini tyrants with unparalleled expertise in teasing and tormenting their peers. But fear not! These experiences help build character, or at least that's what they say to make you feel better. Just remember to arm your child with a strong sense of humor and a witty comeback arsenal. And if all else fails, teach them some ninja moves for self-defense—both physical and verbal. May the force be with your little one in navigating the treacherous waters of childhood!