Oh gawd!

I’ve been intrigued for a while about the Village Hall suddenly seeming flush with cash — fancy leaflets advertising events, “FREE burgers”, “FREE concerts” and so on, so when the latest one (“Join us for The Big Lunch: free soup, sandwiches and cake”) popped up on the WhatsApp I asked what the deal was, thinking maybe a legacy.

Turns out they’ve been diligently applying for every grant under the sun, to which fair play, but now I’ve got a deluge of “We hope you’ll join us!” and “Shall I pick you up on the way past?” in my replies….

I should have kept quiet!