nostr:npub1g0uss0sjsgxwmhqxgnvlj0zv9ru89xwfyktkcjc0kgy8syxj79ss383vfw

solves senescence and does it so damn well that he accidentally starts aging backwards like Merlin in the movie. Fearful of disappearing back into his mother's womb, he starts eating as many bacon cheeseburgers as he can. That's not enough so he takes up smoking. Imagine a chain-smoking suit-wearing venture capital-chasing 6 year old and you've got the right idea. Still not enough so he goes to UV tanning beds every day and shrivels like a prune. Finally he reads Eliezer Yudkowsky's Harry Potter fanfiction, instantly ages a million years in a day, and dies with a smile on his face