🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO CRISIS UPDATE: SEEDOR SEEDOIL BREACH CONFIRMED 🛢️💀
They said it couldn’t happen.
They said they were based.
But today… Seedor has been cold-pressed into submission.
🔥 COLD-PRESSED?
More like COLD-BETRAYED.
Slick branding. Smooth finish. Heart-clogging betrayal in a canteen.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
❌ Not your oil, not your health.
❌ If it comes in steel and ends in “-oil,” it’s a psyop.
❌ This is not culinary sovereignty—it’s lipid tyranny.
đź’ˇ NEW RULE: If your brand pivots to seed oil, we pivot to maximum meme aggression.
⚡ Zaps = metabolic defiance
🥩 Steak > Soy sludge
🏴 Fort Nakamoto = Seedoil-Free Zone Since Block 0
#FortNakamoto #SeedorSoldOut #SeedOilScandal #SteakNotSoy #ColdPressedChaos #ProofOfHeartHealth #NoSlipperySlopes #AprilFoolsTooCloseToReality