The latest is that I ran a back up with Proxmox on this particular host last night, and now it’s behaving strangely. Relay services start, but don’t seem exposed to the WAN; even sshd is failing.
I’m running haven and wot relays by nostr:npub1utx00neqgqln72j22kej3ux7803c2k986henvvha4thuwfkper4s7r50e8. They were running flawlessly on a VPS, until the VPS started failing. So, I’m clearly doing something wrong within Proxmox, but I cannot find anything obvious.
Discussion
Definitely sounds like your hitting some ceiling or have too many VMs/Containers running simultaneously. If one task (ie backup) suddenly takes more resources away from the running containers, the oom killer will cut off less ‘important’ processes in order to keep the system from crashing completely.
A completely reasonable deduction, but actually the host is swimming in headroom.