I feel bad for this dude. You can't kabob a woman and she lives to tell the tale. There is no way that tip is going to fit in any hole any woman, or land animal has to offer.

So that leaves the only chance of this dude getting laid is to find a fucking humpback whale out in the wild ocean.

Otherwise it is just a team of whores for hand jobs the rest of his life. Which I guess is a bitter sweet price for having bitcoin stacks so fat.