It seems like you need a break and recharge internally. Be easy on yourself, batteries are not always full, neither they should be.

Good food, contact to nature, reading, and exercise might help. Praying or meditation depending on your faith helps as well.

I was on a similar situation some weeks back. Self awareness and being at peace with yourself is not something to take for granted.

As to your work as Joe Nakamoto vs a salaried employee, only you can decide. Don’t underestimate the value of having a dedication that aligns with your values and principles, though. And of truly helping others. And this is coming from someone who is in the fiat treadmill and hasn’t been able to decide to step off it because of the kids.

PS. Reading Glitch by Rob Brinded might help you to better understand where your actions come from