i know so many who want it back
i know so many who have moved on
Discussion
manhattan is terrifying to me since i was arrested there
it simply is that way still
if it ever heals, id be relieved
i cant make myself heal
my body remembers
it was so bad having personal tattoos photographed
ones that i never show
it was so bad that they scanned my eyes
i dont care if literally no one else gives a shit
i do
& the people that love me for real
love me for me
care that it kills me
would be great to be in manhattan & feel safe & feel free
it once felt that way
it doesnt anymore
it feels really militarized & corporate with tiny pockets of okness & coolness like pubkey
queens felt cool
brooklyn felt cool
but there you can escape
there is family there
still aliveness there
the sense that,
if nypd tried to randomly grab me
a stranger in brooklyn would literally grab me right back
in manhattan? too empty
too many people with headphones on
like no one would even notice or get to me in time