You are telling fibs and you don't have an 18" willy, it's that simple.

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HOW DARE YOU SUGGEST THAT I AM A LIAR, SIR!?

I am packing more heat down below than anyone here.

I must challenge you to a fisticuffs!

I will not allow you to impugn my honor!

I have but no choice now... I must challenge you to a duel, good sir.

*Yawns* (Been here before), swords or pistols🙄??

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