Thank you friend. I just wish I had a magic calendar

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There is nothing anyone can say to make you feel any better. I lost mum 30 years ago on the 27th, I still miss her, its just easier to remember now without that gut curdling anguish. I laugh a lot more about her mad things she did. I can't tell you when I felt the same, I don't believe you ever feel like that again but you do feel OK.

X

The gut curdling anguish is the thing I really can’t stand. I can’t think about him without crying yet

Then cry. You will stop eventually. The pain gets less every month, just a little. You have to just keep going. You will get through it. You man has your hand and you can vent here as much as you like.

I slid into a bottle!!! Try not to do that, you'll regret it. I lost the whole of '95, such a waste. He is with you forever, its why you cry but one day soon you will laugh at something. Then you'll cry again. Its a bumpy road but you'll get to the end

So I guess what you’re basically saying is that by me just sitting here feeling terrible and crying, I am actually grieving the right way?

Pretty much mate. There is no rule, you just do you. There's an old saying, everything comes out in the wash. Your tears are a part of that wash. God only knows what spin cycle you're on, could be the three hour one, could be the 30 minute one. All I know is, you will be there to fold the washing when its done

Human beings are so fucking strong. I can’t believe how many people go through this

Everyone goes through this x

🫂