You arguably won't get there with a nostr relay. You are trusting TLS at best. SimpleX does give you that advantage tmk. You could require VPN I suppose...
SimpleX Messaging Protocol goes over TLS.
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Hmm, I though onion routing was required, through tor nodes or via dedicated nodes?
https://github.com/simplex-chat/simplexmq/blob/stable/protocol/overview-tjr.md
Seems to be optional, but maybe I'm misreading.
^ Stella
