Usually I just #AskNostr and see what relays other people are using. Iβve limited my set to mostly paid relays or ones where users have to be whitelisted. Dropping most of the free ones seems to do the trick and I donβt mind paying to support relay operators for a better experience.
Some relay operators you can check out:
nostr:npub18kzz4lkdtc5n729kvfunxuz287uvu9f64ywhjz43ra482t2y5sks0mx5sz nostr:npub18ams6ewn5aj2n3wt2qawzglx9mr4nzksxhvrdc4gzrecw7n5tvjqctp424 nostr:npub1lqs30x7466guvx6r2cek8z9d4hpucycy7j08wx58cwx70m206q3qrscejr nostr:npub13hyx3qsqk3r7ctjqrr49uskut4yqjsxt8uvu4rekr55p08wyhf0qq90nt7