Deadlifts? Works pretty much every muscle group. Great albeit brief cardio, and you can't do it very frequently. Equipment is not super expensive and lasts decades. Your neighbors will hate but also fear you.
Discussion
Anyway, the body is probably too complicated for one type of excersize to fit all. E.g. cardio and strength have completely different and sometimes contradictory requirements.
Fwiw I believe Taleb's latest recipe is deadlifts + cycling.