I have a Ukrainian friend, and she teaches me Russian, as it's her native language. She lives in Kharkov, the second biggest city after Kiev. I get the impression that most citizens of Kharkov consider themselves Russian, as they are Russian speakers. She never talks of herself as a victim, although I know that the war has made life for her family far more difficult (and that is an understatement). Victims are inevitable, but thinking of yourself as a victim is not inevitable.