Blaming yourself for a tough childhood and taking responsibility for a touch childhood are not the same. The former is punishment, the latter is empowerment. The former is, "I deserved it," the latter is, "I didn't deserve it, but I'm also responsible to find my healing." The former is about accepting lies, the latter is about accepting the truth, and allowing God into those spaces to show you the truth about yourself, and Him. Because the truth about you and God will heal you.