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There are no guarantees in life. Divorce aside, you could get married and have your spouse die, get sick/injured, lose interest, buy NFTs, etc.

Marriage, like life, isn't about what you get out of it, it is about what you give to it. Do you love your gf? What are you willing to lay on the line to give them the best possible life? Getting married is, or should be, a complete surrender of yourself for your wife, your children, and the future of humanity. Do you think your gf would want out of a marriage where you are dedicated to her and to your children?

Total self-sacrifice is tough to commit to, and it will pull more out of you than you knew you had, but it is also the only investment that will lead to contentment and a happy death. Choose wisely, choose life, choose love.

Bauzen 1y ago

My problem with marriage is the “lose interest“ part you referenced. The state has its own interpretation of marriage, and that’s the one I don’t agree with.

I believe in traditional tmarriage, and I believe in reasonable grounds for divorce: ex. Adultery, abuse, abandonment, etc..

What I don’t believe is the “lose interest” part. But rather the “through thick or thin, till death do us part” kind.

Does that make sense?

Marriage has become a predatory trap for men, and there are countless examples of women gaming the system to manipulate no fault laws to their financial advantage.

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Discussion

Daniel Wigton 1y ago

"lose interest" is not the same as "cease loving" Relationships can go through "I love you, but I don't like you" times. It happens on short timescales all the time. If you are really doing the "til death do us part", and you should, then risking government meddling in gifting each other with a public promise to remain faithful, says "I do" all the more. If there is no risk then there really isn't any promise.

Bauzen 1y ago

Have personally known men who took the risk, got married, had kids, and the moment the kids were born, the women lost interest and left. Some even leave behind the kids, but they do take 18 years of court-mandated alimony…

Some of those women do it numerous times. If the roles were reversed, we would call people like that “predators”

My reluctance to get married is strictly because the state incentivizes this sort of behavior and it’s no secret at this point.

Daniel Wigton 1y ago

All fair points. That happens on average. But what about you? What about your girl friend? Are you average? Are you content to be average? Maybe you are someone who can go into it with eyes wide open and so your "yes" will mean something. You know the risks so when trials come you aren't going to bail, you are going to have difficult conversations, you are going to make sacrifices for the, demand sacrifices of the other, and just do what it takes for love.

The people who can do that are modern heroes. They give their children and the children of families around them a rock and island of stability. The next generation needs that.

Bauzen 1y ago

Felt that 🥹