100% I would love to lighten damus relays load by removing it from my relay list, but then I fear that I wouldn't be able to talk to iPhoners.. (which is I think a fairly large portion of nostr).

It's interesting to watch relay evolution where they seem to be chasing this centralization, trying various things to decentralize but unable to do so yet. Heavily relying on blastr to communicate.

Example: relayable pulls events from popular relays (including damus), and then to compensate sends any events it receives organically to a blastr instance. If it didn't do that, people wouldn't be able to respond to these damus events. If blastr is unable to send events to damus due to spam mitigation or heavy load, these events won't make it to their intended recipients. It's an interesting workaround.. But also makes fighting spam difficult and increases relay load for everyone. I've been doing some analysis and on my relay a high percentage of my events are coming from the same set of IPs (all cloudflare), which I assume are blastr instances..

Anyway, bottom line is id like to see relay hints take off and hope clients can try to implement them soon.