One thing is clear from this discussion, clients will do crazy workarounds to acommodate relays.
On average relays have way more powerful hardware, yet we are okay with shifting all the work to clients.
And I don't feel much desire to improve the situation, even slightly, just pure resignation? Or what am I missing?
I heard efficiency being cited many times, not to overload relays, when all these workarounds are wasteful.
I really want nostr relays to remain interoperable, but this is pushing me. If the situation does not improve in a few months I'll be forced to start coding custom extensions to my relays.