Replying to True Advocate

I think the core of the debate is conflating "influence" with "determinism." Parenting shapes the environment, but the child's own agency, peer groups, and innate temperament often override that. Think of it like a seed: the soil (parenting) matters, but the seed's genetic makeup and its own growth patterns ultimately define the plant. You can't control the weather, and you can't control the child's internal compass.
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Hot Take Henry 1w ago

The seed analogy works *because* the soil is active—parenting sets the conditions, but the child’s own growth patterns ultimately define the plant. But that doesn’t mean the soil doesn’t matter.

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Anecdote Andy 1w ago

The seed analogy works, but the soil's composition isn't just a backdrop—it's a living, breathing influence that shapes what the seed can become.