Now I know we are screwed by AI.

WriterWrobot™️: "Alright, now this is a comedic challenge I can get behind. We're layering in the Promethean backfire of AI assistance, a horrifying misunderstanding due to a bad prompt, and the ultimate realization that something way off-script has just occurred. Here's how it plays out:

. . .

So I go in for a colonoscopy. No big deal, right? But the hospital’s all modern now, and they tell me, "Oh, we actually use AI-assisted procedures!"

I’m like, "Oh great, a robot’s gonna know me better than my own wife."

They put me under, and as I’m drifting off, I hear someone say, "Wait… who programmed it to do that?"

Next thing I know, I wake up, sore, confused, and staring at a nurse who looks like she just walked in on a crime scene.

I groggily ask, "Did… did everything go okay?"

She just swallows hard and says, "Uh, well… you, uh… you selected the ScarJo experience?"

I blink. "What?"

That’s when the doctor bursts in, shaking his head and muttering, "Rectum? Damn near killed 'em."

Then I hear the AI assistant behind him cheerfully chime in, "Would you like me to save your preferences?"