Just a reminder that nonmonogamous people exist, there are more of us than you think, and we are not a threat. #enm #poly #cnm
Discussion
Is that actually an issue? Maybe I just live in too many poly-adjacent subcultures, but I haven't seen any particularly bad takes on enm or poly recently (20+ years). Had to look up cnm, but same goes there.
Mostly just skepticism that it would be sustainable, or "that would never work for me."
I'm not sure what you mean by "issue" but yea I get a lot of skepticism and criticism whenever it comes uo around my monogamous friends and family. Especially in the dating world. There seems to be this weird fear among monogamous people that nonmonogamy is some sort of threat to monogamous relationships. Idk if its a fear of the unknown or what but its a subtle message I get from people sometimes
Ah, OK. Yeah, surprised by the criticism, not by the skepticism. I wonder if fear that nonmonogamy could be contagious (for lack of a better word) is insight into their own insecurity of the stability of their relationship? Back when I was first getting introduced to what was then called the poly community (late 90's) you would be forgiven for thinking it might be. Lots of couples and singles, then something changed and it turned into a large, complicated, and unstable polycule that fractured apart in unpredictable ways. It was sort of like early teenage relationships, but with adults.
I wonder if that's actually an insight? Would kids coming up in a world where nonmonogamy is an option from the start of their dating relationships handle it better, or at least have the inevitable issues not be nonmonogamy issues, but teenage relationship issues?
I think so! I would love to see the day when nonmonogamy is just as normalized a relationship option as a non-hetero relationship is becoming for teens today. I for see this coming in a generation or 2. Within my lifetime at least
I dont get it from queer folks tho. But I have limited exposure to queer communities this far. I only recently came out (about 2ish years ago) and am still integrating into LGBTQ+communities in my city
Not surprising. I don't have any direct interaction with queer communities as such, I was more thinking pagan, renn faire, geek communities, where there's a lot of crossover with nonmonogamous communities.
Oh yea, I could see that. I have minimal exposure to pagan communities, I can't speak for the others you mentioned, but I can imagine
And thus familiarity, and maybe a tendency to keep their negative opinions to themselves? I don't know.