Vim is great and you just suck

Just learn vim and don't say yuck until you have given it a try.

It will be worth it, do not cry.

Once you learn, it sucks you in. Calm down mate, no worrying. You can do quite everything using keyboard inside Vim.

Days have passed it all went smooth

See? I told you, Vim is good.

What you say? You want to quit?

Why would you? Vim is lit.

Don't you leave me mister. Stay!

Otherwise you'll have to pay.

You see there is a hidden clause

You must use Vim without a pause.

It has been an entire year.

You will die here now you fear.

Desparation takes you over, you cannot endure this sober.

Five gins later, on you knees

You pray to god to help you please.

A deep voice descends from sky

Firs you sin and now you cry?

I will repent, you yell out loud.

Now listen here responds a cloud.

If to exit vim is what you desire, set your computer on fire.

Rig it with some dynamite then blow it up, alright?

Now go my child, live your live free of sin. Never again try coding in Vim.