welll... for the sake of being able to function i broke my caffeine fast with an espresso shot ("bica") this morning

probably will make it a daily ritual, gives me exercise and puts me out in the world for 10 minutes to see the comings and goings at my local

already feeling more awake from that little shot, i want to contain it at that level though, from here on, just one, just in the morning, and done

when i'm more fully recovered from this liver/kidney stuff i will very likely put aside a few weeks to completely stop it, and the alcohol too, there is a connection between these two, but not right now, just to keep the level of diuretic effect low enough that i actually make progress against this kidney stuff

i had 3 dreams this morning, most likely thanks to my big plate of chips last night, and they were all kinda pleasant but weird... one of them was weird, like, i was wearing only a shirt and it was long enough to cover everything but was some weird situations... symbolic of feeling unequipped to deal with social situations, being too open

anyhow, as i get more healthy the energy to make changes gets easier to find