Come walk around the streets of my town. You’ll see quickly how silly this all sounds.
You need to trust someone and have a close relationship in order to discover their beliefs and values. For most social interactions, judgement is made based on identity before anything else. And others will do that to you far more than you do it to them.
And what a silly thing to say, “no Jewish ideology”. Of course there is. Would you say there is also no Christian ideology, or no Muslim ideology? Of course not, it would be absurd. Religion is meaningful and powerful and forms the basis for shared culture.
You almost sound like a gender activist who would say “a woman is whatever you want it to be!” Being Jewish does not mean nothing. Just because you don’t understand the underlying ideology of Jewish faith doesn’t mean that it isn’t a real thing.
And you don’t get to choose who you associate with, not really anyway. Not in a dense society with public spaces.
Countries used to be boundaries of cultural association, but that has been destroyed in most European societies.