Replying to Avatar HODL

Something I’m rather firm on is that if you have the ability to make children and you do not. You are in 99.99% if circumstances making a gigantic mistake.

Children make life worth living.

Children provide instant meaning to life.

They inspire planning and care about the future.

They increase joy.

They make life novel and exciting again.

They’re innovative, surprising and imaginative.

They reflexively shape us as we attempt to shape them into better versions of themselves/ourselves.

If you have children and they have children you will be increasingly surrounded by life as you grow old.

If you do not, you will be surrounded by death as everyone you know slowly dies.

You will never regret having kids.

You will certainly regret not having them.

If you have kids you are honoring the sacrifice and suffering your ancestors had to endure by passing the torch forward.

If you do not you are dishonoring them by wasting your life on the meaningless pursuit of your own pleasure.

These are very strongly held immutable beliefs for me.
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𝔽𝕒π•₯𝕙𝕖𝕣 β„•π•šπ•”π•œ 𝔹𝕝𝕒𝕙𝕒 1y ago πŸ’¬ 1

What are the ways you've found to protect against instrumentalizing children for one's own good?

I find much that is praiseworthy in the pro-natal view but I also see the "kids will benefit you" argument as potentially treating children as a means to ones own ends.

That is, the positive effects you rightfully describe only accrue when one forgets about them.

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HODL 1y ago

I think of it very simply. When I was a child I wanted to make my parents proud. Now as an adult I want my children proud of me. Parenting is like an extremely hard test that is pass/fail. Your children will be the ones grading you when they get older. If I am unfair to them today or use them to gratify my own life above their own than I am not serving them and ultimately will be judged accordingly by them.