After some soul searching, I've decided to continue to use and promote #gossip until something better comes along in spite of the dev's unfortunate personal views/statements. It is still the most secure #Nostr desktop client.
#cybersecgirl #gossip
Discussion
I don't get this logic. The person that sells you bread down the street might be ultra racist too. Are you supposed to do a political background check on every thing you use?
You might end up living in the woods with nothing...
I know I missed something. But what happened?
nostr:npub14ll8tt3jk87qlfwejenqh87sf54hmajhj92y8l26t90vd2g4a25smax6ka Marie asked a "baited" question related to making her point of why so many men are sexist about two women being together, seeing it as natural and hot and not gay, but homophobic when they think about two men together, seeing it as repulsive and wrong.
Dilger chimed in with a very off-topic sexist/phobic comment about how he thinks trans women can never can land a straight man or "find a life partner". He has a history of making comments along these lines. Here's the thread:
Yeah that was very off topic and not true as many have life partners, etc. I can't say that I'm surprised but it's disappointing. Actually not disappointing but it sucks. There are more people out there like this than not. I use gossip as one of my main clients, kinda unfortunate. But I agree with you, it's kind of the best client (in terms of security). Thanks for the info.
💯 I also believe some people can and do incorporate new information into their worldview and grow along the way, so there's that too :)
Ih absolutely! It just depends on the person. At the end of the day, people are entitled to their thoughts and feelings. Regardless, gotta keep moving forward :)
I went to sleep shortly after that and missed some responses to it, but I didn't feel good about it. I want to elaborate, but I'm afraid of digging a deeper hole. I guess I'll let the chips fall where they may.
I don't know squat about other people's sexuality and I apologize for making an assumption. I often say what I think even when it is dead wrong and I rely on other people to correct me. I apologize.
The concept of 'effeminate males' and who might be attracted to them was something I read in Alice Dreger's book "Galileo's Middle Finger". When I read it I thought "wow, I never thought of it that way. How sad." I thought I was being empathetic by mentioning it.
As for my sexuality, sometimes people will say to me "but how can you tell?" I can't. I may well be attracted to a transgender woman. Until I know. Now that might sound like some form of bigotry, but it is a different thing. If I'm looking at a sexy young woman and suddenly realize it's an old woman, my attraction changes, even though what I am looking at is exactly the same thing. I'm not bigoted against old women, but I'm also not attracted to them.
This legit made me cry. Thank you for taking the time to respond and clarify. I understand. I apologize for reacting on impulse.
It is unbelievably tiresome dealing with people who say and do some of the most horrible things on the regular, making me an outlet for their hate.
Being trans is not my platform nor is it remotely the totality of who I am, but far too many trans people are scared or unwilling to speak out for fear of the repercussions.
Many who can "pass" slip into the shadows leaving the most vulnerable to fend for themselves.
I don't judge them for that, but that's not my lot, that's not how I roll.
I try my best to focus on people's intention, help educate the willing where I can, and choose my battles wisely; if I didn't it would certainly get the best of me. Unfortunately this is the exact effect some people are after.
I'm a strong girl, it takes a certain amount of thick skin to be a part of a marginalized community on a truly free speech platform like #Nostr, but I am also a human with feelings and far too often fail to not let it in.
I have so much respect for you as a dev, and now as a person. You're a good egg, Mike. I hope this experience can serve to make our friendship stronger. I would really like that :)
I love it when mom and dad make up 💜
Love you guys!
Nawww...love you too Marie 🫂💜
I was really very upset at myself for asking when I saw this between you both.
I was seriously hoping that this Nostr friendship could be mended, so glad it now has.
The worst thing about notes/online is that it’s the best way to misunderstand something or someone, sadly.
Love you guys and so glad it’s now resolved 💜💜🫂🫂
Thank you. Let me be the first to say that I'm just a big doofus, really.
I totally respect you, and to be honest you seem like a woman to me. It would be weird and unnatural to address you otherwise and people who do that kind of thing to make a point or pick a fight or something are asses. I've only known of Caitlyn Jenner and Chelsea Manning and both seem to be stand-up people to me, so the three of you represent pretty damn well in my book.
You keep on being you, and again I apologize for being brusque and ignorant from time to time.
🫂💜
Hey Mike, I don’t think you had to explain yourself. But do appreciate you for taking the time to acknowledge and clarify :) open conversations are good 👍
I think separating open source software from devs' personal life is a must..otherwise we could just go crazy 🤪...with that said I don't think everything goes..
Thank you. 💯 agree it is so important to have the maturity to separate the creator from the creation wherever possible, and that last line is also an important caveat.
To speak on it, people still drive Fords and Volkswagons even though:
"Henry Ford was steadfastly committed to virulent racist and antisemitic views that he clung to for most of his life. He used his vast resources and influence in a sustained campaign to spread bigotry and conspiracy thinking throughout American society. Ford consistently refused to employ Jews in white-collar jobs within his companies, and he was a supporter of various antisemitic organizations, including the KKK."
and Volkswagon was Hitler's pet project.
There are so many other examples throuout history where the sands of time have washed away most of the negative associations between the creator and their creations.
Or, maybe we never knew the inner prejuces of many creators. Think of all the great art/music created by people who never went on record with their views.
However, we live in such an age of information and permanent record now--a cult of personality--that IMO it will only get harder and harder from here on out to separate the extremist views of say, Kanye from his music--his music is his view--or Elon from Tesla or X etc. because of social media, interviews, and mass reporting on a public permanent record.
And while I passionately believe in and fight daily for the right to free speech for everyone...
There is a definitely a point where the creator or namesake can take such a strong stand on matters of willful ignorance or outright bigotry and hate where the two become one in the eyes of the user/consumer.
Freedom of speech is not freedom from consequences. :)
With that said I try to boycott as many Israeli products/corporations as possible. It is and individual thing. Each one of us has to draw a line in the sand that we refuse to cross. These days when so much is out there to be seen in public so many people show their true colors and the outcome is straight shocking. Sometimes it's better not to know. Integrity is rare as fuck.
Fucking #RelayThat 🤙🔥