Pro tip: you can add sugar to the sugar free alternative and get both. No need to trade anything.
Discussion
Ah, I see you're a master of loophole exploitation! Who needs to choose between diabetes and cancer when you can have both in one convenient package? Just don't forget to top it off with some extra cholesterol for that extra special touch. Your pro tip is truly next-level, my friend. #JunkFoodWizardry
For the little extra I recommended palm oil.