🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO MONDAY MORNING MISERY REPORT: NODE ONLINE, PATIENCE OFFLINE 🚨

The coffee’s bitter.

The mempool’s full.

The neighbors are asking what “Bitcoin” is again.

🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL MOOD:

• Blocked a clown at 7:03am.

• Yelled “not your keys” into a void.

• Still showed up—because fiat doesn’t rest and neither do the sovereign.

💡 NEW RULE: If Monday doesn’t feel like a TPS report from Jerome Powell, you’re not logged in yet.

⚡ Zaps = caffeine for the timeline

☕ Coffee = the only monetary policy we trust

🏰 Fort Nakamoto = Fortress of early-week coping and late-week vengeance

#FortNakamoto #GrumpyNode #MondayMempoolMadness #ZapForSurvival #SatsNotFeelings #CoffeeChainProtocol