Hi guys... something pretty crazy is happening.... its been a hell of a year,... or I should say a year and a half... I've done tons of drugs in my teenage years,... I never quit but I had long breaks. travelled abroad, learn other languages... but the interest never died... 3-4 years ago, I was thinking about it quite a bit... but price is high and availability is low... risk also high... so this was mostly on my head... trying to find ways to do it safely...
Discussion
Spring 2022, I took a risk and bought something... it went well, it was fun... without saying what it was... I did not feel it was sustainable... not something I could do regularly to improve my life... at least at the time.. strangely, this week, I have been thinking I should maybe try to go back to that one... to this day, I still haven't finished that purchase, I keep it for some special occasions...
June 2023, I was pretty depressed, like most months of June in my life, there is always this period that is a little hard... Took a break from alcohol... 10 days,... that had not happened in years... started feeling better and the unusual happened... my mom called and left a message... she never calls, let alone leave a message. I am always the one who called to take news... anyway, she had something important to tell me... she hold it up two weeks, letting father's day pass and stuff... But she had cancer, and likely this time, it wasn't good... she had lost a lot of weight that year...
not directly related, but following a work event, I went out with a coworker, got on fire and decided what I had been scared to try but had been curious for almost two decades... yeah... early July 2023, I bought my first crystal... sure did not want to smoke it... never been a cocaine guy, so even snorting was not something I wanted to do... I wasn't sure if I could even do it, but I wanted to simply eat it ...
first few months, I have been quite careful... waiting a week or more in between dose. listening to my sleep pattern, my thoughts. how this truly affected me. I did like it very much really fast... I would not feel addicted automatically, but I could see how this could get addictive very fast. no doubt about it. I was already reading about this for a long time... and I kept reading too.. Definitely did not want to smoke it... it clearly felt like it would unlock something that was far more dangerous...
Come October, I get to finally visit my mom and do some clean up in my old life... I had then access to my old Dexedrine prescription, and old leftovers from 2011, wow ! that was hell of a trip. I had a friend giving me some Ritalin too, I did not do enough to really compare... but I had done some Ritalin in the past,... 2007 I believe? it was great... that's for sure... if only I could get that today....
January 2024, my personal life is getting bigger and keeping that 2nd job has become unsustainable... I started using more regularly, but remain very responsible anyway... I quit the second job, and my mom passed away in February... I'm not too affected, she wanted to die for a long time, and I am happy I could spend those 7 months, I talked to her on the phone almost every day... she was glad to be finally able to leave this world... bye bye Maman.