if i was married
and my husband cheated on me without letting me know
and then gave me hiv
i would be so pissed i would divorce him
if i was married
and my husband cheated on me without letting me know and then was like: baby i have the worst news in the world, i have hiv
i would not divorce him
that's ~me~
dont be me or be me
like whatever i am not saying i am: "correct"
im saying that's where i am
why am i sharing this?
because it is an intrinsic distinction to my lived experience of me
i carry it, i carry it in
once there was someone who insisted on buying me a plane ticket
i didnt know why
to me i was like: ive got it i dont want you to
he really insisted
i really insisted back
and i started to think this disagreement didnt bode well for us for the future
we never met up
he later told me he was sorry he was so insistent but he was that insistent because he did not want the cash i threw in for the plane ticket to compel me to sleep with him if something felt wrong when he shared what he only wanted to share in person