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🚨🚨🚨THEFT AT PUBKEY EMERGENCY NOTE ANNOUNCEMENT 🚨🚨🚨

One of our Scammer Russian Nesting Dolls, Alex Mashinsky, is MISSING!

ITS THE CURIOUS CASE OF THE MATRYOSHKA CAPER. 100K Sat bounty has been placed on information that leads to the safe return of our precious.

🚨🚨🚨UPDATE 🚨🚨🚨

ALEX HAS BEEN LOCATED. He rolled under a cooler and was found alongside a dozen bottle caps and three ping pong balls.

Crisis adverted. Thank you for your support through these difficult times.

💜🍻🤙

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🙌🙌🙌

That's great news. I was pissed on your behalf. I will sheath my pitchfork...for now.

BREAKING:

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Good news 😁

A dozen bottle caps and three long balls you say? I like the way Alex parties 🍻 🏓

Good way for “whoever” took it return it 😉

Alex needs an ankle bracelet! For in house detainment.

I WANT TO SEE ALEX SAFE ON THE SHELF. FOR ALL WE KNOW, YOU KIDNAPPED ALEX