In this particular example I have found that taking it upon myself to be the judge of other people's behavior alienates them and makes them less likely to hear what I am saying.

Most of the time they are just trying to cope with childhood trauma of one sort or another.

Similarly in the case of 'progressives' they are coping with propaganda. Attacking their ego will cause them to dig in more.

They are not entirely wrong in wanting to reduce suffering for others. The means by which they propose to do that are often ridiculous, but the desire for empathy (feminine as it may be) is a healthy human drive.