For most of my adult life, I worried, and was at times convinced, that I would be a “bad father.” Like my father was. I believed it was my fate. I now know otherwise. It wasn’t a curse, and it wasn’t my fate. I’m a great dad, and it’s my greatest pride and joy to be so. It took time to know it, for it to sink in, but here I am.

I have my grandfathers to thank for showing me so much of what it means to be a good man and, in doing so, to be a good father. That’s the most profound realization I’ve had: who you are precedes what you do. It’s your character, your values, and your deep-seated beliefs about what is good and right.

And the good news here is that the inspiration and insights for this can come from anywhere. Even though it may feel like a slow, meandering path.

However, no how-to book or advice on parenting will suffice if you’ve not done the work to be a good man. Work to become a good man. That's where good fatherhood begins.

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Both my grandfathers passed away before I was born, but my dad was a solid guy. I am so proud to have learned from him.

I’ve come to realize that most young men look outside for guidance, preferring to ignore their father’s advice, and become their own man. Its important to have good mentorship in this stage.

Integrity is hard, but it's what makes everything else possible

Well said.

đź’śđź«‚

My father had me memorize this when was about 8 .

Stuck with me hard ever since.

Just a single anecdotal thing that popped in my mind when I saw your post. 🧡👊🏻🍻

https://v.nostr.build/ro5Xkk3CQowv4l0O.mov

Thank you for this. Sounds like your father was a wise man. Powerful verses spoken by a favorite actor of mine.

Another banger:

Desiderata

By Max Ehrmann

Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant,
they too have their story.
Avoid loud and aggressive persons,
they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare your life with others,
you may become vain and bitter;
for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.
Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.

Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.
Exercise caution in your business affairs,
for the world is full of trickery.

But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe,
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be,
and whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.

Thank you for posting this. I've read this before but the cadence never made sense until hearing it read aloud.

Beautiful. Thanks for sharing 🙏🏼.

Too bad I did not grow up with a dad.

I’m thinking a lot about you dad.

Can’t wait to get to know your soul once I’m done on this planet 🫂

Thanks, Dave. đź«‚