Dumb women be like,

"Hey, you did something bad.

You are a bad man!"

Smart women be like,

"Hey, you did something bad.

But I know you aren't a bad person, deep down.

There must be some mistake.

You had a difficult childhood.

Or I provoked you.

It was an accident.

You were just stressed out.

Actually, there's probably a very good reason for this and it's actually much more complicated than I can even understand -- I am such a silly, stupid girl!

I should have known better.

I will try to do better next time.

I apologize."