Answered at https://bitcoinqanda.info
Not bad.
Q.
What is bitcoin, explain like I'm over 70 years old
A.
Bitcoin is a type of digital money that is created and held electronically. It is not backed by any physical currency like the US dollar, or any other traditional currency - instead, it is made up of a mathematical algorithm that means it can be easily and securely exchanged between people without the need for any sort of financial institution or middleman. Bitcoin is a decentralized system which means that it is not controlled by any government or financial institution, but is instead accessible to everyone with access to an internet-connected device. With Bitcoin, you can securely make payments for goods and services, transfer money to anyone in the world, and even shop anonymously, all without the need for a bank account or any other financial intermediary.