“Side effects may include:

- a sudden increase in your follower count

-compulsions to check the app every five minutes

-general loss of time

Some users have reported a tendency to over share personal opinions, resulting in awkward family dinners and strained relationships. In rare cases, use of this app has been known to cause spontaneous bursts of creativity and inspiration, leading to an increased desire to write poetry or compose music.

Some users have reported inability to stop scrolling through their timeline, leading to late nights, bags under the eyes, or general feelings of fatigue. In extremely rare cases, users have reported that the app has caused them to become too informed about current events, leading to increased activism and an overall sense of civic responsibility.

It’s a brave new protocol. Ask your doctor about Nostr, today.