Yup that's usually the case. Sadly Blue Wallet is kinda not working great now. I use getalby and then point my blue wallet to that, I also do that with ln.tips (telegram style custodial). The best though in the end is to build your own node (any idiot can do it, really). Open some channels and yeah...

I hear MUUN wallet is quite good, Zeus LN is excellent with a node, Zap is another for your own full node. Honestly trying to remember which wallets give you full custody though with your own 12-24 seed phrase... Anyone able to chime in?