Correct, unless you use a dedicated IP address and do port forward in the router to yourr node you won't be able on remote. Maybe in the future we will have a clinwt with TOR capability, thus, we can use the relay as intended

Locally you are able, if you login to your relay from localhoat (using your local IP) , you will get the relay address with the port to add in Amethyst or damus . obviously it will work only on your WiFi, while remote it won't