Also, I feel extremely lucky, because if the wallet holder had seen the pending incoming transaction, they could have done an RBF on their own and snatched the funds.

A few months back when mempool was backlogged I remember a transaction where someone had been trying to combine a bunch of small transactions and some good Samaritan bumped the fee for them.

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Actually no they can’t RBF the transaction.

They could CPFP though (basically spend their own output with a lot of fees, making replacement very costly).

Am I mistaken or isn't it possible in most wallet software (eg Electrum) to just spend a UTXO again as long as it's not spent confirmed? I remember having done that in the past. So it's an "unknown" RBF

I am referring to the scammer RBFing

yes totally understand, wasn't clear sorry. I meant more the previous comments about needing the right tools and special technical skills. If you use the right wallet software you don't need any extra skills right? Or which tools do you use to create a PSBT in such scenarios?

Random bitcoin-cli commands and obscure tools