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I’m quite old, you might have noticed 😂

One thing I didn’t realise until quite recently was everybody lacks confidence. Just a lot don’t show it.

I have confidence because I realised that I’m the most confident person in the room because I decided to be and nobody stopped me.

Remember that schoolyard bully? Turns out he was scared of you, so had to threaten to beat you up so he could feel safe.

Jordan S 9mo ago

You've held yourself together pretty good Mike, I don't know how old you are but I imagine you're better off than a fair portion of your peers, the gray hair is the only thing that would tell anyone that you're "old".

Old is relative, keeping your body together is what matters the most, there's 30 year Olds that probably are in worse shape than you.

Gen Z as a generation, myself included is less confident because our mistakes are broadcasted to the world, one wrong mistake, and our lives could be ruined forever, I think people are afraid of many things, of speaking out, or thinking for their own personal, and financial safety.

Maybe it's the hormonal disruptions too.

For me, personally I'm unconfident because I just have difficulty relating to people because my interests are different.

Here most things I talk about are relatively normal like Bitcoin, technology, finance, etc.

And then my financial situation makes me feel a little ashamed as a male, and I haven't dated anyone because for years I wasn't really interested in it growing up but now that I'm older, I don't really have confidence in my physicality, etc.

It's all complex, people are complex.

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Discussion

mike 9mo ago

Yes, I see the broadcast issue.

I socialise with a lot of people in their 30's because I'm involved in the tech startup scene. There are two types within that group. Full on social media life and complete abstinence. The latter group seem happier and more rounded.

NOSTR allows anonymity, so you can create npubs and say what you like without it haunting you in real life.

It sounds like you should push yourself to go to some Bitcoin meet-ups or even a conference if you can.

Also, date. Finding the right life partner brings so much benefit, it can also be hard work, but it's worth it. No matter your life situation, there are kindred spirits.

Like the Overton window, if you move outside your comfort zone, a little at a time, your comfort zone will move with you.

A big thing and I mean a big thing, my wife taught me, is everybody is friendly and wants to chat (with a few exceptions). Strike up conversations with random strangers.

The first few times you do this will feel awkward AF, if you don't project confidence, then you will falter.

Lie to yourself, convince yourself you're the greatest person on the planet and everybody wants to get to know you. Start talking to strangers with this lie permeating your brain.

After a few successes, this lie will start to come true. I promise.

I also know this is unbelievably difficult to do. My wife helped me with this, we now talk to anybody and everybody, even principal ballerinas at the Royal Opera House 😂

Jordan S 9mo ago

My main thing right now is paying off my car, I feel like once I've done that it will enable me to do more.

Maybe buy a gym pass, or buy better foods, or invest more, or go to college, etc.

And I know that I could do that stuff now, or that I should but I like keeping things to a budget.

I want to find ways to earn more but I think it's hard with my current job, I'm about to hit 4 years, and it's one of those places based off of seniority because of our union, once you get the good positions you're set for life but the problem is I'm about to be 28, and I don't want to wait another year, or 2 or so for my life to get "better".

They haven't fired me yet, and I work really hard but I just feel stuck, if I leave then I have to start in a new company during a recession which puts me at risk of losing that new job but if I stay, and don't move up the way that I should be then I'm wasting my time there.

I want to try to stick it out for another year, or two but I don't know if it's the ideal thing for me to do so.