In some ways, this is the kind of thinking that makes me reconsider any kind of judgement against others. While we may all have the potential to become something we detest, many of us already have done things we detest. It is also not universal what is deemed detestable.

If I wish to be supportive of someone I do not know (and by know, I mean at the deepest of levels, but the English language is failing me here), then I must accept that they may have done detestable things that I am unaware of, and may yet do detestable things in the future.

Your go-to detestable thing seems to be rape. For me, it is child abuse. This is for me, the purity test: I must be able to stand beside someone who has abused a child, and who may yet abuse a child, or the gesture of support is not genuine, tainted by suspicion and judgement, and worthless.

Not happy thoughts, but what I am owning in my quest to be a better human.