>watching The Greatest Story Never Told with hellhound GF

>sitting on the couch

>she's nuzzling up to me

>only reason I got her to watch a whole 8 hour movie is because I offered to buy her jalepenos

>she's banned from every store in the state

>movie finally ends

>tail wagging

>she's eager to get jalepenos

>pull it out of the fridge

>it's pepperocinis

>smug grin crosses my face

>hellhound wife is absolutely devastated, eyes are literally on fire

>get the shit kicked out of me (affectionately)

>get told to go return the pepperocinis and get a jar of jalepenos

is this abuse